I Will Love You No Matter What…Even If You Get Fat…But Don’t…

In the few months since I have been engaged, a plethora of married people have given me their unsolicited advice.  For the most part, it is usually along the lines of, “marriage is so hard, it’s like a second job.”  While I am well aware that finances (Did you really just spend $190 on red skinny jeans?”  “Hellllooo??  Did you not see Kim K wearing them two Sundays ago?!?”), traffic (this is a real problem for couples in LA) and child rearing (even though our kids are going to be BEYOND hot…it still won’t make them less of a pain in the ass) create a constant struggle in a marriage, I also think that most of these couples DO NOT subscribe to what I like to call, “The Foam Finger” concept.   Now for those of you who have not heard me wax poetic about this concept, let me explain it to you.  You know those tacky and gigantic foam fingers sports fans hold up at games to indicate they are the absolute #1 fan?…well, that’s my metaphor for supporting your partner NO MATTER WHAT!  Basically,  being your better half’s #1 Fan forever.  For instance, your partner comes home and declares, “I killed someone.”  Your immediate response should be, “Where do we hide the body?”  NOT…”I won’t wait for you” (and then immediately email that guy from work who buys you kettle chips from the vending machine). 

The core of the “Foam Finger” concept is that if there is mutual support in your relationship, you can get through anything.  Most people say they have the eternal “Foam Finger,” but the minute any shit goes down, their Prius is peeling out of the driveway at lightening speed.  I’m not saying that I think my marriage is going to be easy, but I do know that my theoretical “foam finger” is waving proudly and vice versa.  It’s really saying, “I will love you NO MATTER WHAT…even if you get fat…but don’t.

 

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~ by farahk83 on August 31, 2011.

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